Bob Geldof’s has announced that he wants a million people to descend on Edinburgh next month. The police are already saying no.

Geldof hasn’t been clear what he wants this million to do. There is a protest rally organised by Make Poverty History four days earlier, the same day as “Live8”. A million people protesting to the G8 in Gleneagles would be better off in London: the world leaders at the summit will be no less aware of them and London is much more able to cope. It would probably involve less travel overall, which would be better for the environment.

And the number itself is problematic. Edinburgh can’t cope with a sudden influx of a million people, but who’s to say how many will come? Geldof wants a million but he’s not ticketing entry to the city – it’s a number plucked out of thin air. Fewer people might make the trek up north (or south if you’re reading this in the Highlands), but with no-one counting them all in, who’s going to turn back the million-and-first person?

See also Chris, Alan and, on Live8 itself, Justin.

Monday

Stayed up into the early hours watching music videos. We sat through a mid-eighties compilation of Bucks Fizz promos – interspersed by “Miss Jay Aston” comments – before remembering that Brian Grant, director of The Long Game, had directed music videos. A Google search turned up loads of videos, many of which were on various videos and DVDs around the room. And so we sat up watching videos from artists ranging from Haircut 100 and Queen to Peter Gabriel and Spandau Ballet.

Up early to go into Westminster to run some errands at LibDem HQ. On my way back past the Houses of Parliament, I spotted a grey-haired man standing alone near the public entrance. It was Trevor Kavanagh, political editor of The Sun. One of my friends always seems to run into people like that. I would normally pass on by but she’s very good at striking up conversation. With this in mind, I decided to be more assertive and started a conversation.

We had a brief, pleasant conversation. He asked if I was a Sun reader and I admitted that I’m not. “Oh, you should read it. It’s very good.” We discussed some of the paper’s election coverage and I bit the bullet and mentioned that I’m a LibDem. “Ah,” he said, “I think we could have done more there actually.” I suggested that by “more” he meant “be even more negative about”. He nodded.

I glanced away and was surprised to recognise Channel 4 News‘s outgoing political editor Elinor Goodman walking towards us. I suppose in retrospect that right outside Parliament is as good a place as any to find political journalists, although she was meeting Trevor. She introduced herself and I went on my way.

Popped into Holborn to look up some probate records for my family history research before heading back to south London. We watched some excellent Victoria Wood episodes in the evening. More music videos later and the realisation that I can name the band members of very few of my favourite bands.

Tuesday

Train Eavesdropping III
On the way in to London in the morning, two yoofs (probably wearing hoodies) were sitting behind me on the train. They were the only people in the carriage talking and despite their street patois (if that’s the term) it was pretty clear they were discussing which guns they wanted (“a sniper’s gun would be cool”). I like to think this was nothing more than a laddish chat about weaponry, like middle-aged men talking idly down the pub. But it was still uneasy to overhear.

Back to the probate office and then round the corner and to a cafe with Dan. Then, following his directions, I headed off on foot to Kings Cross. A few moments later, I walked past the ITV News Channel’s Andrew Harvey.

Got home in time to watch a pretty unpleasant documentary about Agentha Fältskog on Channel 4.

It was my birthday on Friday so, with work closed on Monday and Tuesday, I spent a pleasant weekend with friends in London.

Friday

Before heading to London, I went out for a drink in Glasgow (for the first time). There was much discussion of Star Wars and Doctor Who, and while I was there the news came through the Billie Piper will not be in the whole second series. It will be very interesting to see how the production team deal with that: a Rose clone, or a completely different type of companion?

Saturday

Train Eavesdropping I
On the train down on Saturday morning, I overheard two Scottish pensioners who were reading a news story about the resignation of James Gray, briefly the Tories’ Shadow Scottish Secretary. Pointing out his Scottish roots, one of them said she knew his mother. They then commented, with a little disdain, that he was now based in Wiltshire.

Did the Indie‘s sudokus on the train, including the Super Sudoku which I’ve sense posted off.

Saturday evening consisted of watching a particularly fine episode of Doctor Who (review tomorrow, probably) and a trip to the pub. We didn’t stay in for Eurovision, although it occurs to me now that it’s probably for the best that we didn’t win as we’d surely end up with Patrick Kielty presenting it.

Which reminds me that we also caught some of the ITV2 coverage of Celebrity Sex Resort, which disappointing (and I’m not explaining why it was disappointing) wasn’t called Celebrity Love Island 2. I also found a small advert for the programme in my jacket pocket, which had sneaked in there when I was handed a small packet of Love Hearts by a young woman at London Bridge a couple of weeks ago. I hadn’t looked at it and thought they were just promoting the sweets…

The thinking behind Celebrity 18-30 Holiday is pretty obviously flawed. Their first mistake was the assumption that Big Brother‘s success derives from people hoping to see contestants “getting it on”. Following this up with the idea that anything with celebrities (or, in this case, with the word in the title even if there aren’t any actual celebrities, e.g. Celebrity CatfightWrestling) will get a big audience and you’ve got a bit of a mess.

We also briefly considered whether Celebrity Wrestling would have been successful if it had better (B-list, say) contestants. Surely people would tune in in their millions for David Jason vs. Ross Kemp? Or Victoria Wood vs. Anna Friel?

Sunday

Bummed around London most of the day – completing the Observer crossword and then mistakenly throwing it away – before heading back to watch more TV.

Train Eavesdropping II
The train was full of Chelsea fans (they’d been visiting Chelsea, where they weren’t from, obviously). They were merry but good natured, but I was rather unimpressed when the man sitting in front of me started singing sweary football songs in front of his young son, and even more so when his son joined in. They had started on what seemed to be a rather anti-semitic song about Tottenham Hotspur when I, fortunately, had to get off the train.

Was introduced to an actor friend of friends who was a very nice bloke and has done some Doctor Who audio work, and watched Channel 4’s Dispatches programme about Labour’s election tactics. Some of these were pretty minor – anyone who believed that the people sitting behind Blair when he made speeches were “real people” is a bit naïve. Their tactics to stop journalists questioning senior MPs, though, seemed little more than paranoia. I spotted a university friend who now works for a Labour MP playing an “endorser” at two different poster launches.

Here ends Part I. In Part II: guns and The Sun.

Apparently my facetious suggestion re: hoodies and CCTV made more sense than I thought. Tuesday’s Daily Telegraph blames hoodies on “Big Brother”. I was expecting an anti-Channel 4 rant, but it’s Big Brother in the 1984 sense.

This is the usual law of unintended consequences. Just as the increasing sophistication of home-security systems has led burglars to conclude that it’s easier to wait till you’re in, knock on the door and punch you in the face, so the ever-present 24-hour surveillance devices have ensured that, even if you get a look at your assailant, you’ll never be able to pick him out of a police line-up. “Er, well, he was wearing a hooded sweatshirt, officer.” “Did the shadow on his upper chest indicate any other features, such as the length of his nose?” “It might have, but I couldn’t tell, as the sweatshirt was black.” “Hmm. A black sweatshirt. Well, that narrows it down a bit.”