You'll like it (not a lot)

(Here be spoilers.)

JK Rowling must have been watching too much Crime Traveller (i.e. any) when she sat down to write Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. The finale is only missing Sue Johnston shouting "Slade!" in a melodramatic way.

Yes, this evening I went to see the new Harry Potter film. I'm not a reader of the books so I didn't know what was coming; nevertheless, the plot was pretty uninspiring and the twists predictable. Both the acting of the young leads and the special effects have come on since the series began, but the result is that my criticisms lay entirely with the film's story.

The movie is slow to get going, with much talk of Sirius Black but little action of any clear relevance (although elements turn out to be of vague importance later on). There is a lack of structure: a bunch of stuff happens, but with no real thread connecting each incident to the next, and Harry ends up in the Hogwarts infirmary far too many times. This is, perhaps, the result, as with the previous books, of cramming a school year's worth of events into a two-and-a-quarter hour film.

There is, eventually, a climax of sorts, as everyone reveals their true intentions in the Shrieking House. So many revelations at once, muddled in with Snape's unnecessary appearance, make for a bumbled scene. (Most of the revelations are obvious, after being heavily trailed, although one - the identity of Pettigrew - seems something a cheat with only the slightest of hints until Ron gets bitten.) Having reached this climax, we then slow down again in order for Michael French and Chloë Annett - sorry, Harry and Hermione - to go back in time and do it all again. And once Harry has been shown fighting off the Nazgul - sorry, Dementors - we (OK, the kids the film is aimed at) are patronised with a detailed explanation.

The Prizoner of Azkaban is directed with more flair than the first two films, but that can't make up for a weak story that doesn't flow. It is entertaining but, lacking in structure, feels overlong. Worth a look, but don't expect too much.

(PS: For an extra dimension, try watching as if Lupin's secret is that he is a paedophile.)

Cliff Richard and The Shadows

For Babylon 5 fans (making this topical in about 1995). Apologies in advance.

Monday (do you see what I did?)

Went to see The Day After Tomorrow on Thursday. I'm not a big fan of films built around special effects, of which this is a prime example, but I really enjoyed it. Minor spoilers follow.

The basic premise, of a worldwide catastrophe brought about by global warming, is tremendously propagandist but nevertheless welcome in an age when the world's biggest polluter doesn't seem to interested in not destroying the planet. In order to show this devastation, by way of some fantastic CGI (as well as the occasional vista that looks like it had been painted), a story in which "While the weather takes control, One Man searches for his son" was thrown together. His quest achieves absolutely nothing (apart from the death of one of his best friends), since his son would have survived just as well if he hadn't bothered. However, this flimsy premise provides the weak engine that keeps the tale moving forward, allowing each computer-generated set piece to show itself off.

The performances are competent, even if some the actors are giving it their melodramatic best. Jake Gyllenhaal does particularly well in his first blockbuster lead, albeit having to play a character not designed for the average audience member to empathise with: too-clever-by-half straight A students are not the most likeable characters around (someone should inform the producers of Big Brother too).

There are a number of British characters played by British actors, which is always nice. There is a clear attempt to be authentically, rather than stereotypically, English, although that doesn't stop Ian Holm inviting Dennis Quaid for a cup of tea. (It is heavily implied, but not stated, that most of the Royal Family freeze to death.)

Some OK acting and a few witty lines aside, the film's star is undoubtedly the freak weather conditions brought on by some technobabble about Atlantic currents. The water is realistic, the blizzards are believable, and the destruction of Los Angeles is awesome.

If you see one no-brainer disaster movie this summer, make it this one. It has a strong message, but the lack of empathy characters or a strong story mean it's a message without longevity. You'll come out of the cinema determined to do more to protect the environment. And five minutes later you'll be filling up with petrol on the way home...

How to follow 24

My favourite (albeit the only one I visit) 24 site: 24 - Handy Diagrams. Be warned: it includes Day 3 spoilers!

It's a two horse race

I was out in Kirkstall this evening delivering letters to local voters. There are a significant number of students at the Headingley end of the ward and we were explaining to them why they would be better off electing Liberal Democrats. It's not just our national positions (opposing top-up fees, taking a principled stance against the war) that are popular: on issues closer to home (tackling landlordism, keeping the streets clean, reducing crime), LibDems in Leeds are ready to take action.

Kirkstall is close to my heart as I lived there for two years, during which time I helped to halve Labour's majority. We have a really good, hard-working team in Kirkstall who deserve to win; and residents in Kirkstall deserve a hard-working team representing them. With the whole council up for election this year and more and more people disillusioned with Labour's failings, we have a real chance to change things for the better.

Why I won't be eating GM sweetcorn

Last week, the European Commission agreed to lift the EU's ban on selling genetically modified food for human consumption by approving the sale of Bt-11 sweetcorn (and there's a brand name that'll have tins flying off the shelves).

Much news coverage of this has been slightly misleading as this change in the rules does not affect the planting of GM crops, only their sale. One of the principle arguments against the growth of GM crops is that they may "infect" organic produce and thereby reduce choice for those consumers who wish to be able to purchase "uncontaminated", "natural" produce. But, by the same argument, those who wish to buy GM should be able to do so. GM sweetcorn will be labelled as such and those who are concerned about its effects should avoid it. At the risk of sounding like a free marketeer (and I don't mean Porthos), if consumers don't buy GM crops, there will be no point in companies' producing them. If they do sell, it's because consumers are happy to eat them, in which case they should be allowed to.

I will be boycotting this Bt-11 sweetcorn myself, as I don't like sweetcorn.

08:00:00

I've finally finished working my way through Day 2 of 24. It may have been full of twists and characters whose motivations wander like mad, but it was excellent. Yes, Kim Bauer does just deliberately get into scrapes to make it more suspenseful, but suspenseful it is. Top notch cliffhangers throughout (that's the Doctor Who fan in me coming through), and most notably the final shock in the closing seconds.

The last episode of Day 3 is being broadcast in the US tonight. If it's anything like the finale of Day 2, it will be worth waiting for.

Consecutive Number Plate Spotting

As if coming up with colours for concepts wasn't enjoyable enough, another excellent game to pass the time (or waste it) is Consecutive Number Plate Spotting, courtesy of TV's Richard Herring. He has been playing for nearly 18 months and has passed the 700 mark. I've been playing for week and have reached 10. I will, of course, keep you up-to-date with my progress. If you'd like to join in, read the rules and get started!

The power of television, part deux

Just in case you visited the eBay link in the previous entry and wondered why on Earth I was drawing attention to it: I visited the auction just after it was mentioned on HIGNFY and noticed the hit counter was then at over a thousand and the bidding had passed five pounds.

A few minutes later, there had been more than ten thousand hits and the bidding had reached several hundred pounds. That's when I posted my blog entry. Shortly afterwards, a couple of idiots started bidding in the millions. There have now been over seventy thousand hits, but the seller has cancelled the sale. Perhaps they've decided the photo is too famous to sell. And who wouldn't be tempted.

The power of television

Have I Got News For You got a laugh at Ian Hislop's expense after showing an eBay auction of a signed photo of him that had had only six hits and no bids even at the 99p starting price. They're probably still laughing, but for different reasons.

The Silver Jubilee

   

Thank you to everyone who's wished me happy birthday today. Even to the person who texted me thus:

Happy birthday! As a mathematician, you will realise that your age now rounds up to 30 rather than down to 20. Enjoy!

"Purple is the international colour of equality"

Who decides these things? Clearly more intangible concepts should have colours. So from now on:

• turquoise is the international colour of itchiness
  
• beige is the international colour of amnesia
  
• puce is the international colour of tweeness
  
• grey is the international colour of onomatopoeia

A fun game for all the family that would make any journey fly by at half the speed.

A PR Exercise

Monday's opinion poll in the Guardian shows that a large proportion of people think the Prime Minister should stand down before the next election. This isn't surprising: the Government misled the electorate over tuition fees, continues to support the Tories' Council Tax system, and, most significantly, backed America's deeply divisive war in Iraq.

But Tony Blair's party won only 40.7% of the vote in the 2001 general election. So, even then, 59.3% of voters didn't want him to be Prime Minister (and that's not including the Labour Party voters who didn't want him as their leader). Take a poll of the general population and you should expect to find that most people don't support the Government - not because they have withdrawn their support since 2001, but because the Government never had the support of the majority of the country. Even in 1997, when Labour swept to power on a legendary tidal wave of popular support, only 43.2% of voters backed them - 56.8% were against.

Although I would like to see MPs elected by a system of proportional representation, that's not my main point here. Rather, it's that opinion polls showing that a majority of people (and the 46% in the Guardian isn't even a majority) oppose either Tony Blair or the Government should be taken with a pinch of salt, since the Labour Party was opposed by a majority of voters at the last General Election and still runs the country. More significant are voting intention polls and polls establishing the public's views on specific individual issues, although even with these it's important to know what questions were asked. But revealing that the PM doesn't have the backing of most of the population isn't news.

Acting against type

The campaigns listed by doctorvee have my full support.

Eurovision Plan B

Once again the UK's post-Eurovision coverage has been full of reports of block voting, countries backing their neighbours, etc., etc. In pointedly noting the douze points vote swapping between Greece and Cyprus, these stories have forgotten we were as much a party to the "love thy neighbour" principle. The only points, seven, that saved Ireland from a well-deserved nul points were from their neighbours: us. And they were one of the few countries to give us any points.

Much of this friendly voting cancels itself out, and it takes more than local support to win. Let's not pretend that the ten points we gave to Cyprus had nothing to do with the nationality of the 16-year-old from Kent who performed the (tedious and warbling, but oh so worthy) Cypriot entry. It is not as if we didn't give points (five) to the eventual winners, or that we didn't give any to second place Serbia (three) or third place Greece (we gave them the maximum twelve).

Of course some of the voting is political, but there is also good reason for countries from the same region to support each other. Many nations - Serbia was a notable example -enter songs that represent their own culture. Eastern Europe has a different cultural background from Western Europe and that is reflected in those countries' traditional music. It is hardly surprising if Macedonia or Bosnia recognises positively aspects of Serbia's entry, just as the UK is more inclined to vote for upbeat pop or cheesy ballads sung by teenagers.

Blair's position on Iraq has undoubtedly lost us votes the last two years, although potential Eurovision failure was probably the worst argument against a pre-emptive, bilateral, dubiously legal attack. The UK's problem with countries voting for their friends is that we have precious few.

Now there has been the suggestion that we should follow the examples of the USSR and Yugoslavia: break up into several states (or submit separate entries from Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland and England) and thereby contribute four times the votes, which we can shower on each other. An alternative would be to choose the winner on a popular vote across the whole of Europe, rather than allowing tiny Monaco the same number of votes as sprawling Russia. But this would mean doing away with the clumsy voting from each country which is half the fun.

So I have a cunning plan to secure our success next year: the UK should enter a better song.

The English are sick to death of Labour and Tories and spit upon the name of Eurovision

Picked up two singles yesterday: Graham Coxon's Bittersweet Bundle of Misery and Morrissey's Irish Blood, English Heart. Coxon's has more than a passing musical similarity to Coffee & TV and the lyrics sounds like they may have been co-written with a 12-year-old. It's nice and jaunty though, so that's OK.

Morrissey, on the other hand, has produced a criminally good comeback single, the crime probably being that it's only 2 mins 39 secs long. Great, slightly wistful tune, and the pointed and stylish lyrics that made him famous. Easily vying with Franz Ferdinand for Best Single of the Year so far.

And now to undermine that carefully cultivated indie cred by mentioning that it's Eurovision tonight. I've had a flutter but I was quite thrown by the results of the semi-final so I'm not going to try to predict how the viewers will vote across Europe. And I still think we'd do better if had classically-trained actor James Fox representing us.

You can view all the entries on the Eurovision website, which also reveals that research at the University of Leiden has discovered that one of the "most used words by Eurovision fans in connection with the song contest" is "Eurovision".

So very true

Indie rock! You're my most favourite type of music... Your music channels lots of emotion. On the top it seems simple, but underneath there's always a deep meaning... As your name you're independent from most of music! Stay that way! Good on you! There's so much variation in your style...from deep and thoughtful like The Stills, to happy go lucky like Belle & Sebastian, to dancy and catchy Franz Ferdinand, and back to boogie down Hot Hot Heat and The Rapture...

What genre of rock are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

A cunning quiz this as it included a question along the lines of "What type of rock do you like?"

Nod: Rob Tiffen

Mundanity and Rage

My RecipRoll tells me I've got a new linker. Kelvin is kind enough to say that I take time for "decent pop culture". I may be sitting here in a Suede t-shirt but I don't think that can make up for the mention I just gave to Eurovision.

"Notice to candidate nominated of decision as to validity of nomination"

That's the plain English heading of the letter I received from the Returning Officer for Leeds City Council today confirming that I am now a candidate in June's all-up local elections.

I will therefore have to be less flippant and blog a bit about some of the issues facing Leeds.

However, the Eurovision semi-final is on BBC THREE at the moment so that will have to be later.

10/10 for effort

As I was leaving work today, I noticed a sign warning against trying to help people trapped in a lift. It explained that there were specious procedures to follow to free lift passengers and that one should assure them that help is on its way but definitely not try to get them out.

This notice was, of course, inside the lift.

Anyone remember which Dick was which?

Nicole Kidman appears to have gone into remake overdrive. Interested in finding out more about The Stepford Wives (out this summer - I've still not seen the original), I visited her entry on the Internet Movie Database only to stumble upon another project in which she's starring: Bewitched. That's right: a film remake of the series in which Samantha, a witch, gets married and starts a family. With hilarious consequences.

I'm somewhat bemused at this particular choice of role (and, indeed, that anyone would want to make a Bewitched movie). I'm sure she'll say she was attracted by the top-notch script.

Coming soon, no doubt: I Dream of Jeannie: The Movie. Although that would be more amusing if, erm, they hadn't already done it...

May the weak force be with you

This nice little article by Frank Close appeared in today's Guardian, summarises where we've got to in understanding the origins of the universe and identifying the tiniest of subatomic particles. I saw Professor Close give a very interesting lecture on a day trip when I was studying physics at school. He is notable for being probably the only scientist in the country whose name is an anagram of a breakfast cereal. Apart from Dr Kris Ricepies, of course.

I can recommend Frank Close's book The Cosmic Onion. Out soon (which probably explains the Guardian article) is his new book, The Particle Odyssey.

Incidentally, I am posting this via the new Mail-to-Blogger system, so it may come out mangled...

Addendum: It did come out mangled because of line breaks in the e-mail, which particularly affected the HTML tags.

If everything collapses...

Blogger has some new features so I'm going to play with them. If this blog gets oddly formatted, loses its comments, etc., that's why.

Addendum: I have taken off the new comments system (because I don't like it), and I've reverted from archiving posts as separate pages (because I don't like it). Let me know what you think about the new template. In the longer term, I'm going to redesign my whole website and build my blog into that design, but that's a while off yet.

Getting the message across, Ninja style

A little campaigning Flash animation

Down I go

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very High
Level 7 (Violent)	Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	High

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

Pounding the pavement

Went out delivering campaign newspapers in Headingley today. Really good exercise - must have burned off a good thousand calories. I did end up with newsprint all over my fingers though.

The Leeds ward boundaries are changing this year so the entire Council is up for election. The LibDems have all three seats in Headingley, and our hard-working councillors deserve to get re-elected this year. With the Labour Council currently only a few seats from No Overall Control, all-up elections and the postal vote pilot, it's anyone's guess what the political landscape of Leeds will be on June 11th.

Teaser Trailer

I will write up in long and intricate detail the story of my appearance yesterday on Brainteaser. To keep you going in the meantime, here are a handful of images from the show.

The rain in Spain falls mainly on me

I'm just listening to Xfm and am most impressed that they are playing a band as old and as good as ELO. Which reminds me that between the bands at the Franz Ferdinand gig they played ELO, which only served to show up the support acts.

I'm also reminded, having seen The Fiery Furnaces' album in HMV today, that the only memorable bit of their performance was the repeated line "Tropical...icy-icy" from their song Tropical Iceland. Oh, and the standout (possibly for the wrong reasons) lyric "The rain in Spain falls mainly on me." Don't take that as a recommendation though.